Dear Pastor Carbert,
Again I feel obliged to respond to your letter in the Eagle of June 23. In it you mention the cliff over which homosexual people will inevitably fall unless they see the error of their ways and change their lives. Have you considered that these cliffs, subtly named “guilt” and “shame,” have been placed in their way by you? You can just as easily remove them by understanding that people of a different sexual orientation do not choose to be different. To encourage and expect them to become what they are not is paving the way for many human train wrecks. It is like demanding of black persons to shed their skin and become what they are not. Do we not much rather want to encourage and enjoy authenticity and diversity?
My gentle, immensely talented and very gay friend shared some very painful experiences with me caused by those who should have loved him most. Can you imagine what it must have felt like for a 15-year-old, insecure, confused and vulnerable boy to hear his own father brag about how he and his buddies used to wait for gays outside a bar just to beat them up? Can you imagine him overhearing his own mother commenting on a news item about the unavailability of a cure for AIDS with the words, “so what, they are all just a bunch of f***ts.”
My friend, unable to make himself “straight” in spite of the fear, loneliness and degradation, finally came out of the closet when he was close to 40 years old. Is this really what society wants? Is it not up to you, a man of influence, to remove the cliffs of prejudice and let people live and love without shame, without guilt? Is it not their lives that matter most rather than their lifestyle? Society cannot afford to sacrifice those often tremendously gifted men and women to satisfy ancient belief systems.
Pastor Carbert, please allow me one final observation. In this world there is nothing more precious and rare, more divine than true, unconditional love. Proclaiming to love everybody quickly devalues love to become mere condescension.
Respectfully,
Marlis McDouall
