A Cochrane dad and former mental health counsellor is looking to quash mainstream notions that substance users are the problem and that alcohol or drug addiction is a choice. Jeff Couillard, who runs Responsive Parenting and who ran a webinar based on creating addiction-resistant kids, said the blame for addiction should rather be pointed at the users’ circumstances. “Substance use is commonly viewed as a ‘problem,’ particularly when young people are the ones using drugs or alcohol,” Couillard said. “This can naturally lead parents to want to prevent, minimize and stop substance use from occurring in the first place. Undeniably, excessive and problematic substance use leads to many problems in the lives of young people, from adverse health effects to conflict in their relationships.” Viewing ‘substance use’ as the problem is misleading at best, he said. Instead, we should be more attuned to the “real meaning of the behaviour.” “Imagine you had an infection and a fever that came with it. If all you treated was the fever, the infection would continue to get worse. Problematic substance use is like that, a symptom of a deeper underlying issue,” Couillard explained. Couillard said he developed this notion over 10 years while working at the Enviros Base Camp, an addiction and mental health treatment centre for youth. “One of the most striking things is that without fail, 100 per cent of the time, the youth’s problematic substance use was a response to the contexts, relationships and pain (i.e. trauma) that they’d found themselves in. With that in mind, if parents are worried about addiction taking root in their children, it becomes much more important to worry about the quality of relationships in the home, protect children from what is known as ‘adverse childhood experiences,’” he said. This includes abuse, neglect, domestic violence, substance use in the home, and more. “You can be addicted to basically anything, the resistance piece is ... relationships matter a huge amount,” he said. Another aspect of resiliency is having mindfulness which can come in various forms including participating in physical activities. The goal is to cultivate a skill to be present in life and one of the main tools for that at Enviros is adventure therapy. “Rock climbing or paddling through some or mountain biking – those types of activities demand presence otherwise you fall,” he said. Mindful skills can also be transferred into everyday life, such as while sitting in class or at home. “It’s more about how we understand and make meaning out of the things we do,” Couillard said. “How can you have a sense of presence in your life even when it’s not demanded?” At some level, these become practices (and) we have to find ways to practise in our daily life.” Skills that a child should be taught include: Emotional Literacy and Self-Regulation Executive Functions (particularly impulse control and ‘response inhibition’) Communication Skills (the ability to translate feelings and needs into requests, and the ability to listen to others and hear the feelings and needs within their words and behaviours) Mindfulness Skills (substance use is about altering the present moment, for whatever reason. Mindfulness is about embracing the present moment and not needing to escape it) For more information or to receive the Responsive Parenting newsletter or podcast visit www.becomingresponsive.com/parenting.
