For openers, this is not to take sides on any issue that has been flooding the news wires, newspapers, radio and television of late. But it is an ironic look at how we in Canada do things these days.
To be honest, I have no idea who wrote this bit of ironic prose. But please read it and then decide where we are today.
In Canada we have social welfare programs that are actually proud of the fact that they are distributing the greatest amount of free meals and food vouchers in history.
Meanwhile, the National Park Service, administered by Canada Parks and Natural Resources, asks us “Please Do Not Feed the Animals.” Their stated reason for the policy is because the animals will grow dependent on handouts and will not learn to take care of themselves.
I think that ends today’s lesson.
Then there was an unrelated message that was sent loud and clear. While picking up my seven-year-old granddaughter from school recently, she asked if she could see my cell phone. As we walked to the car I handed it to her and she almost gasped saying: “Grampa, this is from the 19th Century.”
That did it. I had to get into the present and out of the past.
So today, I have a brand-new iPhone and, while I have no idea how to operate anything but the call or be called part, I’m now up to date.
And I will learn as I go.
To be honest, I’ve been reluctant to get into modern times because I insist our dependence on those cell phones and what I’m learning are Apps, is becoming too much.
Having said that, on the first day of granddaughter pickup with my new phone in tow, she saw it on the front seat of the van. Seconds after, safely in her seat with the seat belt locked in, she had opened the phone, made a couple of what I would call magic moves and had installed her own e-mail address into my favorites list. And when I dropped her off, she asked to see the phone again and instantly took a picture of herself and posted that beside her e-mail listing. Remember, ladies and gentlemen and boys and girls, she’s seven years old.
Anyway, I am more modern today and learning as I go picking up something new by the day. Heck, maybe by the hour if someone is there to help.
And I need all the help I can get.
Another step up to modern times, at least for me, was the purchase of a new television plan not long ago. Well, my wife Donna Lee did the purchasing, and I’m reaping the benefits. And this plan offers me the best of both worlds.
By going modern I can also go back. And that is thanks to the magic of something called PVR. Now, what PVR means is beyond me.
But I now can watch one television show and tape another at the same time. It works with sports events, too, but it hurts when you tape the second half of a National Football League playoff game because of other commitments, only to be told the result before you get home.
But the real bonus is not having to watch those pathetic reality shows when you can tune into a channel that plays nothing but great television from the past. All In The Family, I Love Lucy, the Mary Tyler Moore show, Bob Newhart, Night Court and M*A*S*H to name a few. Or Matlock, Murder She Wrote and the Rockford Files from the crime beat in the long ago.
Of course, the acting back then was not like it is today in the serious programs. But they got the job done for that period for sure.
But when it comes to comedy, I don’t think there’s much today that you could say is better than we had in the old days – pointing out specifically All In The Family and what they got away with.
For bad acting, you can watch original Batman and Hawaii Five-0 which provide action and humor at the same time. Although that wasn’t the original plan of action, I’m sure.
I’m into the present but still like the past.
Today’s joke is actually fact in describing a diplomat. He is a man who remembers a woman’s birthday, but not her age.
Recently, I was sent a list of the laws of golf and the first one said no matter how bad your last shot was, you should have inner peace knowing that a worse one is yet to come. This law does not expire on the 18th hole, since it has the supernatural tendency to extend over the course of a tournament, a summer and, eventually, a lifetime.
